University of Atlantis: Go Sea-Monkeys! Posted by Hello
University of Atlantis: Go SeaMonkeys!
Those devoted to these pages may have noticed the sudden vanishing of UDR ( Upside Down Russian) when he was once such a presence in this blog. Well I should probably comment on that absence. I spoke to UDR before I went to Paris and he commanded me to return to the US. Those were his words, "I command you." My response was if IF I returned on time, he better be at my place to listen to all my stories.
I came back on time, I called, I couldn't go anywhere what with babysitting my swollen ankle, other people seemed somewhat interested in my stories, but they had the same re-action ( Delta lost your luggage going TO Paris? I don't know why this is so hard to believe, but it is apparently.) I was looking for someone who would listen with enthusiasm, and UDR, for all his faults, was the most likely candidate.
Except he had vanished, gone, curled up his tootsies and vamoosed to parts unknown. Until Saturday night he called me on the phone at 4:30 in the morning demanding that I immediately remove the Atlantis material from my blog ( It took him three weeks to notice and it wasn't until someone else informed him about the material being posted). He was adamant. I refused and hung up on him. ( Mind you after an hour of arguing back and forth before realizing you can't argue with crazy because crazy always wins.) The next day he sent me an email "forgiving" me and claiming it was my choice to leave the material up. I blocked him from my email and left the material up an extra day before adding my next post.
Our relationship is now strangely strained. When I see him he goes out of his way to be nice to me, and I barely acknowledge he exists. This may be some what related to the fact that I have recently met Alexei the crazy Ukrainian-who isn't so much crazy as a master of entertaining facial expressions-and Constantine the aristocratic Roumanian ( think Adrian Brody without the tan)-so my bizarre eastern block accent fetish still has some fulfillment.
And that would be the end of that, EXCEPT I have a habit of doing odd google searches when I should be doing things like you know grading papers or preparing my statement of purpose for grad apps or even maybe enjoying the sunshine outside. I happened to casually google Atlantis and what comes up but a "new theory" written by a Russian about how Atlantis was really off the coast of Ireland ( In fact, I even found the original paper in Russian-not that I can read it.)
Viatcheslav Koudriavtsev's paper is very well reasoned and supported. He no doubt did his research, and unlike UDR who ties his theory to the flood in Genesis, VK ties his case very closely to Plato, whose works contain the first known references to Atlantis. VK's theory came out in 95, which means that for all of UDR's arm waving that I had violated the natural order and would be punished severely for writing about such sacred matters, it turns out, much like the X-files, that theory was already out there (I refuse to call it the truth).
True VK does nothing to tie the destruction of Atlantis to eugenics ( including the engineering of pigs to be like human flesh) as UDR has, there is enough "innovation" and embroidery added to VK's theory that UDR isn't competely guilty of plagiarism the idea.
The truth is as much as I mocked the idea, I really love the idea of being an Atlantean. In keeping with my new ( would be racial? ethnic?) heritage, I would like to propose a t-shirt. A sea blue t-shirt with U of A on the front-the back it says on top University of Atlantis-there should a picture of a SeaMonkey wearing a varsity jacket holding a football with the slogan Go SeaMonkeys on the bottom.
I would wear it until it falls apart.

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