Those of you who have been actors have surely taken the trust fall. In fact, anyone who has done one of those project outreach things knows the trust fall. There a variety of different ways: backwards off a wall, forwards into waiting arms, blindfolded into the arms of your scene partner.
They used to call me queen of trust fall. No matter how close to the ground I got. No matter how many times people dropped me, and they did, I never tried to catch myself, I never tried to stop myself from falling. Scene mates were awed, directors were impressed, my ass got bruised.
Tonight I was holding hands with the jolly green giant as he walked me home after a dance showcase. He was going out with his friends and I was going out with mine. "You aren't jealous?" I asked.
"No, I trust you," he responded.
"After a week you trust me?"
"After fifteen minutes I trusted you."
Now I have that effect on people. People meet me and they just spill, the name of their favorite teacher from grade school, if their boyfriend has a big dick, if they hate their jobs, their thighs, their life. I just have that effect on people.
But I am amazed by it.
And part of that, is I finally got dropped on my ass one too many times. Even before Israel I was covering bases. Yeah, I trust certain people to keep me from falling on my ass, but I don't trust anybody to stay single on a saturday night.There is always the back up, the contigency program, the break glass in case of emergency man.
Even now, in the already had but willing to revisit category there is the Virginia Contigency boyfriend and Adam the "naked chef." In the haven't had but think about often there is there are the hot Argentine guitarists ( hey why narrow my imagination unnecessarily?), miracle gro, and hot isreali dancer (who apparently has such a tiny penus that the hubble telescope might be needed to confirm that he has one-and I have this on good authority)
And he trusts me.
When I was with Eric, I was hit on by any number of hot men. You can't imagine the men I turned down. My heart ( well maybe not my heart) still weeps at the thought.
Maybe I got dropped on my ass too many times. Maybe you get to a point and you say "Alright motherfucker, take your blind fold and your 'believe we will catch you' attitude and shove it up your ass." Maybe I fell off the wall too many times. Hit the floor too much. Sure hitting the floor once or twice ok. But after how many times is it ok to say 'You know what Mr Director why don't you trust me for a moment?'"
I come home with hot Israeli's cologne on my body, Miracle Gro's smile on my mind, the possibility of Adam close by, and the party where any number of unknowns might show up.
He trust me.
The question is, do I?
Miracle Gro, the Jolly Green Giant, and the Little Hot Pink Dress
Bad Bunni posted at 12/13/2003 10:55:00 PM
OK, so I have been dating someone this week. Yep, I been holdin' out people, but after the whole Israel debacle, can you blame me?
But, of course, I wouldn't be Bunni if I couldn't come up with some quality scandal. It's also a long damn story, so put on some christmas music and get the hot cocoa out (you might want to spike it with a little peppermint schnapps).
Saturday night I met a guy who is six foot four. For the record I am four foot six. You do the math. Apparently he likes me, or he's really dedicated to bedding me, as we went out on sunday night and then again last night. On Sunday I told some Miracle Gro related story, and so my date, let's call him the Jolly Green Giant, said he wanted to see me dance. Well it so happens there is showcase this weekend. And Giant wants to come, in fact, he's freakin ecstatic. Which terrifies the hell out of me. I mean I've never seen a man so happy to spend his free time watching ballroom. It borders on being a violation of the natural order.
Yesterday, I was dancing with Miracle Gro and he asked me what I was going to wear for the showcase, if I had a costume. I described the dress I had bought last year. He told me to wait, he brings out this little latin ballroom outfit. I mean LITTLE, not quite L'il Kim little, not quite pardon my pasties little, but when I spin you can see the cheerleader like dance bottoms little. Miracle Gro insists I try it on, and when he sees it on he says "Dance with me." We dance and then says "it's yours." Now this dress was originally probably around 1500 dollars (it custom designed for a specific dancer), but it is seven years old. The owner, apparently, doesn't want it anymore and was trying to get Gro to sell it, but Gro gave it to me so that I would "Have an outfit that reflects how you have grown as a dancer."
Then Gro tells me that he tried to call me the other day because he was having computer trouble. So I talked to him about it, I couldn't figure out the issue so I gave him my cell number and told him I would come take a look. (Ok let me check this out- Uh huh-let me just lean over here for a sec-oh yeah, baby, this looks fiiiiiiiine.)
I go running off on my date, I meet the Giant. I am showing the Giant my new dress and who comes in but Gro. So there I sit talking to both , flanked by two attractive, blonde, tall men. If my father were alive, this would have killed him. If there were anything worse than me dating a blonde hair blue eyed man WHO KNOWS GERMAN, it would be dating two of them. ( which I'm not technically dating Gro, I am just lusting after him, but still) Giant didn't seem to notice anything, although he suddenly got strangely insecure at the end of date. ( I know, a guy with me being wierd, what are the chances?)
So now I am going to dance for the Giant with Gro on Saturday.
As I said before, sometimes it really kicks ass to be me.
Failure is not an Option
Bad Bunni posted at 12/10/2003 02:11:00 PM
A fellow professor turned in his grades yesterday. On top of teaching classes, he also has to teach workshops. Workshops are essentially recitations, they do not stand on their own. They are "bundled" with other courses. In addition, workshop teachers are not allowed to give homework, but are allowed to give in class assignments. Yet, workshop teachers still submit a grade.
What is based on?
Attendance and class partipation.
This fellow professor had a student who missed 11 classes ( out of a possible 14, as workshops only meet once a week) and the few classes he made it to, he was disruptive and unprepared. The professor tried to fail the student.
But he was told by his department head, after submitting the grade form, that he CAN'T fail the student. Granted it says right on the syllabus that only three absences results in a failing grade. Granted the absence policy is DEPARTMENT MANDATED. Granted that the very department head who told him he can't fail the student is the same person who came up with the attendance policy to begin with. Granted the department head couldn't come up with a legitimate reason for not failing him. Still, the professor was basically told he can't fail the student.
I guess those who can't do, teach, and those who can't teach, administrate.
G-d's Love, We Deliver MLA style
Bad Bunni posted at 12/10/2003 01:15:00 PM
Well I shouldn't be posting. I should feverishly be reading papers and exams so I can make my friday grade deadline. But I just had to share.
The first year I taught, I had a student who tried to pass in an argumentative paper on how G-d is still good despite September 11th. Despite repeated lectures in my class about how papers need to focus on things that can actually be proved in a somewhat objective manner, I get a paper which, at one point, attempts to prove that G-d's love is at times reflected through the acts of individuals.
You know, it's not like I don't have enough issues with G-d, on top of everything else he won't stay out of my class room.
Couldn't they pick a more fun fictional character? Like say the Easter bunny?
It's a Date
Bad Bunni posted at 12/09/2003 12:55:00 PM
When I was in high school, I had a male friend, Joey. We often went to dinner together or movies together. One night, for my birthday, he took me out to dinner. We often took each other out for dinners on out for special occasions like birthdays, graduations, awards. Now up until this point Joey always had a girlfriend, but Joey's latest had just broken up with him. Half way through dinner, Joey referred to the evening as a date. "What do you mean it's a date?" I asked. "I'm taking you to dinner," he responded. "But we're friends," I said. "But friends can date," he said. "Didn't you watch when Harry Met Sally? No we can't." And on it went until finally I said "You know what? It's not a date unless both parties agree that it's a date."
When I was in college, a male friend of mine, who was in the closet, said to me "You know I think we should date more." I responded with "Uh, yeah of course, isn't that what we are trying to do each weekend?" And he said "No, no date each other." To which I almost fainted. I asked him to clarify and his idea of a date was basically what we were already doing, going to the movies, dinner, concerts together. There was no mention of romance or physical intimacy. So what the exact shift would have been was unclear.
Conversely, earlier this year a man I had met once called me and asked to take me to the movie "Down With Love." He actually said on the phone "But this isn't a date." I was kind of surprised by the statement because it was clear from his phone message that he was very attracted to me. I thought to myself "If taking a girl that you find attractive to a romantic comedy isn't a date, then what is it?"Still I accepted the premise and went. He paid for the movie, drinks at a bar afterwards, and the cab home, but was it a date? Does paying for it make it a date? ( He did ask me out again. So would that have been our first "date" or our second?)
This weekend I met a guy on saturday, and we made a date for Sunday. For me part of the date concept is that it has to be a pre-arranged meeting. On the date, I made some comment about the evening being our first date. "No it's not" he said "yesterday was." "I met you yesterday by accident." "Yeah, still I think of it as a date. If it makes you feel better it was one of the best dates I ever had." So we discussed what constitutes a date, and I told him my Joey story. Again my date disagreed with my definition of date. That both parties have to agree, he stipulated, was not actually a requirement. "But it does help" he conceded. He could offer no alternative definition. Apparently, much like the Supreme Court and pornography, he can't define date but he knows one when he sees one.
To me a date requires that both parties agree on a pre-arranged meeting time and possible itinerary of activities ( the itinerary may change or be vague) for the purposes of exporing a social relationship-most likely to establish compatiblity for a romantic and or sexual relationship. Other types of dates, such as lunch dates or business dates, are usually clearly denoted by the attachment of a clarifying words (ie business date) to make the type of date clear.
Still that there are "types" of dates indicates there is a several species of dates that I have left out. What about you all? What makes a date for you?
Bad Bunni posted at 12/08/2003 01:08:00 PM