Ok so let me continue. There is a lot more serious scandal up ahead, but of course, I have to attempt to tell things in order.
So when we last our heroine (myself) I had come in dead last in almost every dance. I should say that not only was it that Drew didn't know the steps, but also I kept telling him that the judges can't watch us the whole time, just do the steps we know really well. Even the managers of the studio told him that, but did he listen? No. He kept doing the steps that we didn't know.
Ok so then I went and did the scholarships. Now the scholarships are the most competitive events because you are competing for money and also there aren't the normal seperations (age, ability,gender) you are up against anyone in your division on the dance floor. I came in second in smooth which means I seriously kicked butt. For a first timer to get second is a serious coup, which means I must be pretty good. That was the saving grace of my saturday.
Ok I should say now that I've been drinking and as much as I want to write about the rest of my saturday and how Drew got fired and how Max is now my permanent teacher. (Oh poor max has been trying to make me feel better. I keep telling him not to bother. Today he was trying to tell me to think of it as a hobby. I told him I take everything seriously. He was like "Well then, things will be much harder on you." As if I hadn't already noticed that. Like when I was five or six years ago, but you can't change your nature. A rabbit is always a rabbit. It can't become a fox. )
On tomorrow's thrilling update how Drew ditched me at the saturday night banquet. How I've felt like I've been hit by a bus for a week. Max as the new latin teacher. A Beast update.

More scandal.
So I was about to talk about saturday. Well in order for this to make sense I have to explain a little about comps. This is a Fred Astaire Comp. Meaning that all of us competing are Fred Astaire students and teachers. Now there are certain steps that Fred Astaire teaches. Depending on your level you are expected to know these certain steps. So I thought I knew the steps because here Drew, my former latin teacher, is teaching me steps. What I didn't know until about four days before the comp. was that he was teaching me from his former dance studio which was not Fred Astaire. So the day we are competing I was up at seven am trying to teach him the steps. I was teaching him. The only reason I knew the steps at all was because my very first teacher taught me both latin and smooth dancing (smooth-foxtrot, tango, and waltz). So needless to say I was unhappy. We finsihed dead last in every dance but one. I mean, I could have handled it if it was that I was terrible. Iw ould have said "Alright time to seriously train." And I would just close the damn studio every night. But no it wasn't me, it was this guy totally screwwed me. I found out Monday that the studio had been on him to train with one of the other teachers to learn the steps, but he kept blowing them off. Apparently they were not surprised (although they were surprised exactly how clueless he was), they said they reealized about a week before that things weren't going to go well but it was too late to switch me at that point. But it isn't over. See Drew kept telling me, "Oh we shall do well at our next comp. It's just we had to overcome insurmountable odds." And so I said "Uh, what insurmountable odds?" And he responded, "Well, I hurt my leg, I got sick, I got the design job, which we couldn't anticipate" And I didn't say it, but I was like "Uh so where does the we come in? Because all I here is You, I apparently had no insurmountable odds. And I'm not the professional. I mean if I'm paying for you to be at comp, I expect you to KNOW THE STEPS." So I was very unhappy because I figured this was the one and only competition that I would win a first place. Its easy to beat out the inexperienced, but the higher up the harder it is. Trust me I saw what I'll have to go up against in five years and I'm not looking forward to it. So I'm trying not to cry, but its really awful when you know you look like an idiot out there, even compared to other beginners. It was the thing I was the most afraid of. I mean, it was kind of like a show I did the last year I was an actor. It was an awful show. Let me say that againb it was an AWFUL show. It was, lord help me, a concept piece. (Whenever a director says concept to you treat it like a fire-stay close to the ground and GET OUT!!!) yes a concept piece of a play titled "Leonce and Lena" which was a political satire in the form of a fairy tale. (Oh yeah, feel the burn.) To make it even worse the actors didn't go off stage, but had to sit on the side on benches. So once I was done with my scene I had to sit there, feeling the silent rage of audience directed at me, and thinking "Oh G-d, I have to go back out there. Oh G-d, I can't believe. Oh lord, this is really awful. Ok it's only two more scenes and then I have to sit here again. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE make someone pull the fire alarm. Let there be a fire. Ok five more lines and I have to go on. Oh I hate this scene. They hate this scene. Let's just skip to the end and all go home. Ok here I go."
So it was like that, sitting on the side lines waiting for them to call me so I could go up and make an ass of myself. But I couldn't get upset. I had to "shake it off." In acting this means shaking any negative feelings so that one can move on and get where one has to be in order to start the scene. The idea is there is always hope. If one keeps investing in the scene or the play, the audience may eventually join. With dancing the same principle applies, just because you mucked up the last 3, 7, 10, doesn't mean you can't still kick but on the next one. There is always hope. But it's tough. I had to admit I kept thinking "Ok time to go out there and come in last-AGAIN."
Ok I need to stop here. So at this point it's Saturday afternoon and I came in last in all but one of my latin divisions.
Tomorrow we shall move on to the rest of Saturday and then hopefully at some point we will be fully caught up.
At which point I can start discussiong the current beast dilemma and Max the wonder mutt.

So this weekend was the regional ballroom competition. There was much scandal and gnashing of teeth.
I should start by saying even getting to the damn competition was drama in and of itself. Who knew it would so hard to get into New Jersey. And of course because this isn't like a normal four day vacation but a ballroom comp. I've got a thousand bags. I've got the garment bag for my three gowns and the shoe bag for my two pairs of shoes. I've got half my suit case filled with moisturizer, foot lotion, hairspray, make up fix, a large selection of costume jewelry, several pairs of nylons, nail polish (for touch ups), nail polish remover (in case I got beyond the hope of touch ups) etc etc. I was like a not so mobile spa. What I could have used was a mule. I mean, I just looked so stereotypical, little jewish girl laden with beauty products. (Hey, forty years in the desert I'm bringing my moisturizer and my kiehl's lip balm.) What I needed was a burrow, but burrows are not available for rent on the east coast. (Hint hint entrepreneurs, here is a large untapped market-burrow and mule rental.)

So I got the comp. and I have to say a ballroom comp. is one of the few places where overpacking is the norm. Watching people leave on sunday I realized quite a few could have used maybe two or three burrows. So My assortment of make up and dresses was the norm. So I watched dancing thrusday night and I would like to say you haven't lived till you;ve seen a whole room of women all in studded gowns seriously dance. I'm talking Viennese Waltz and avdanced Foxtrot. It was just amazing. It was worth it just to watch and be inspired by these women. (Although I have to admit I kept thinking "But I'll never be that good" sniffle.) Then Friday I did my smooth dances. It went well although not as well as I hoped. I got first in a couple of divisions, but not all of them. This made me realize that A I have very high standards for myself and B even when I achieve everything I want (my goal for this comp was just to get a couple of firsts which I did) I still find a way to discredit it. Like if I had gottenf irst in everything I would have been like "Oh well it's only a regional comp." or "Well, it's because I was dancing way above my level and all the people I went up against didn't have the same level. (The practice of consciously signing on to compete a lower level is known as "dancing down". Look at me with the dance competition.)

Well there is even more scandal, but I have to sleep. I'm totally wrecked and i should be correcting papers, but we all know that isnt' going to happen. I need a paper grading burrow. Someone shouldget the genetics sompanies on that.

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