-Richard the Third

Those of you who know your Shakespeare will have some idea why Richard ( and this quotation in particular) is one my favorites, second only to Titus Adronicus in terms of pure villianry. I thought I was utterly miserable at the beginning of the day, but I had absolutely no idea how bad it was going to get.

At moments like this, I wish I wasn't an atheist because then there would be some sort of complaints department I could register my displeasure to. Before Rabid left for Paris, she talked about her faith in G-d. I said, "Fuck G-d. Put your faith in me, I at least return phone calls." But on days like today I have to wonder what evil I could have possibily perpetrated to be rewarded in such a fashion.

I have that New Englander stiff upper lip. Last week I had to take off my shoes and teach barefoot because I was bleeding all over the place ( not that my students noticed as long as I stayed behind the podium). The bleeding has gone down of course but the pain has increased and today my limp is not just apparent but truly obvious ( most likley that cool breeze is responsible). So I am trying my best to keep my students from noticing including limping behind the library tour my first class had.

Now anyone who knows me knows that I am a master of misdirection when it comes to the disability. Oh I'll talk about it, but let you see it, I will cry tears of blood before I let that happen and so on top of all the other misery, the administration being obnoxious and evil, the other teachers being idiots, the students who can not follow even the most simple set of directions, and the other assorted pains in my life which I will not go into detail about, the health issues are what always upset me the most. No, upset is the wrong word, enrage. Because I have never stopped trying get this fucking albatross of a body to work like its supposed to and it just won't cooperate. And I'll be honest with you, I'm fucking sick of it.If I could have just one day off once in a while it wouldn't be so bad. And even now it's not as bad as it has been in the past. But to be trapped in a body that doesn't work, let me tell you, I have nothing to fear from Hell. I will be lighting cigarettes off of the Devil's tail saying "Honey, honey honey, seen it , done it, wear the t-shirt, read the book, bought the film rights. You know what? Just let me go now because really you'll break before I do." And if he questions me I'll just say "Look when I was eleven years old I spent two months in a wheelchair watching my gym class learn how to square dance and that's just one small episode from the lifetime of horror." And the Devil would say, "Uh, yeah, well just make sure you sign out with the front desk before you leave."

That is if I believed in the Devil, which I don't. The Jews call this planet the veil of tears. There is a very good reason for that. I can only hope I'm not one of the 36 people on whom the fate of the world depends (you see it's not just a blog, it's a scholarly research problem-do you know to what I am referrring in terms of the 36 people on whom the fate of the world depends?), because if it's true now they are down to 35.

And if I get my hands on a weapon and find those other people, it will be even lower than that.