My Cat, My Husband
So my cat has taken to watching TV. Not by sitting at a normal distance but by sitting in front of the cable box which with her gynormous and furry butt makes it impossible for me to change the channel. Perhaps not accidentally in the last year she has gained three pounds. Now we are both on a diet. I come homeand she bitches at me about her dinner, I bitch back at her about the cat hair left around the house. We both stare at each other and then go to our respective corners of the apartment.

Go on tell me we aren't married. I dare you.

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