A substitute for love: revenge

What do I get in my email today?

An email from Israel which reads, in its entirety

"Kis kis


Christ, you'd think the guy could spell kiss.

But here is where I get the Nero Roman Emperor Seal of Cruel and Unusual Punishment-my plan is to play Farm Fresh off of Israel and vice versa

And before you get on your whole "Listen why torture these men who don't deserve it?" rant- I'm on break ok-and I deserve cheap entertainment. And if I get a thrill torturing men who desperately deserve it, well, slap a blind fold on me and call me justice.

My plan is to see Farm Fresh and give him this speech ( again, anyone wants to use this in actual break up-serious points-but I better get credit)

"Is there anything more regrettable than pleasure almost tasted? Like an apple brought to your lips, the smell so intense it seems you can taste it already, the press of firm flesh against the tips of your fingers, your upper lip. The anticipatory salivation. And as you open your mouth, it slips from your grasp. And without every tasting it, you still held it long enough for its loss to leave a permanent scar."

Yep, going to tell him an old boyfriend wants me back, meanwhile I'm going to tell Israel I have a new boyfriend and that if he REALLY wants me he is going to have to work for me.

A friend of mine thinks that I should have them see each other, a kind of boyfriend coliseum type of idea. The idea is attractive.

Of course, I would never consider dating either one of them seriously again, but they don't know that


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