This Does Not Bode Well Posted by Hello
 
I know you are wondering "What the hell is Hans of former SNL Hans and Franz fame doing on Bunniblog?"
 
I'm glad you asked.
 
I'm not having a good week for reasons other than the Jackass. I have no sleep, my non boyfriend has vanish-ed leaving me sexually starved as well as overwhelmed with work, underwhelmed by my students, totally disgusted by my colleagues ( including The Mistake-who recently revealed during our latest staff meeting that not only can she not SAY Aristotelian, but doesn't know who Aristotle is), and without any male attention to distract, flatter, or even annoy me in amusing fashion.
 
And then I sign on to "mate.com" to check my online male fan base.
 
Now you would think after the fiasco with the agoraphobic recovering alcoholic, I would just pull my profile and move on. But, well, if I ever did anything reasonable or even remotely good for me I think I might suffer a seizure. Essentially I say I keep my profile up because the profiles and emails I get sent by men are precious and amusing.
 
Our good friend Hans (featured above-sporting what my friend termed once "an ironic mullet" which I thought would make a great name for a garage band)  sent me an email today asking if he could eat Chinese food off my tummy. ( Yes, he used the word tummy. Stomach probably was too many syllables.) And then chided that he would prefer to eat Japanese food off of my belly since it's healthier. Yes, I can imagine that chomping egg rolls off of my abs would have a high caloric toll, but then that is the price of trysting with the Bunni. ( Generally, the price of trysting is measured in martinis, but you know as long as it's bad for you I'll accept it as currency.)
 
And you know what the worst part is? So far this is the highlight of my week.

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