I was reminded of this recently because of Kiss Kiss, who, as much as he is a great writer, has a certain phrase that I have heard so often from him that I am thinking of choreographing some interpretive dance to it, just so I have something interesting to do the next time I hear it.

When I was younger, just after my parents divorced, my father who had been fairly perfectionistic before became utterly impossible to please. That I went to an academically competitive private school-he hated and made fun of it. My friends who he never met-hated them too. Despite having a more rigorous physical education plan, he claimed I was out of shape. You get the idea.

In response to his demanding claims, whenever he would get into one of his huffs, I would simply say, "Go ahead and be that way. See if I care."

For whatever reason, he hated that phrase as well. But I was god damned if I was going to change how I talked as it seemed clear to me that no matter what I did, it wasn't going to please him.

It got to a point that when my father started to get in a huff, he would make fun of the phrase before I said it. He would mimic me in a high voice, "Go ahead. See if I care." Being made fun of by my father at that point was pretty standard, and so I simply ignored it as I ignored most of his behavior. He would often tell me that one day I would eat my words.

After about a year of this, he took me out to lunch one day. I was seeing him about every six months or so at that point. Trying to limit my exposure to his insanity after he accused me of ruining the major reconstructive surgery that I had undergone instead of accepting the diagnosis of one of the premiere orthopedic podiatrists in the country-that I should have never had the surgery. I was a poor candidate, and the surgery's failure was not the fault of anyone except the doctor who thought it was a good idea.

At lunch, he made a big deal about saving room for dessert. I rarely ate desserts even then. I liked candy but not pastry. Still he ordered for himself coffee and tea for me and demanded that the dessert menu be brought.

Instead, they brought a chocolate cake that had white frosting spelling out, "Go ahead. Be that way. See if I care."

And damned if I didn't eat it.

Still didn't change my attitude though.