Hey, even six nippled women need love.

The quote for today, courtesy of blogger Jin.

OK, OK, you thought I was pissed before. Let me tell you. Generally I am a very passive aggressive girl. I'm not the type of girl who expresses rage directly well at all. But, on the rare occassions my full anger comes out, you had better hope you have G-d personally on your side, because you are going to need his undivided attention.

Now that much of the rage that comes out on these occassions has little or nothing to do with the person at whom it's directed is pretty much given. Not that they are entirely innocent, but case in point two years ago this guy, let's call him Ragnarok, he breaks up with me. Now I really didn't like Ragnarok, I wanted to break up with him, but being me I was worried that it would hurt him. He was already seriously depressed and I didn't want to add to that. So he breaks up with me. Do I see it as a favor.=? No way. And the day he did it I happened to have had like the worst three days since Eric had left ( Eric had only left two months previous). So I let him have it, the full demonic force of my rage.

Well, he broke up with me and he gave me the big forbidden three 1 it's not you it's me 2 I really care about you and 3 we can still be friends. I just snapped. Six months later when I ran into him, he was still scarred by what I had done to him. Now granted much of the rage directed at him was misdirected rage at Eric, but this man was shaken to his core by what I said.

So I was pissed with men to begin with and then Jin, instead of hanging with me in the park where I could have mellowed in the sun, I get squished into a car with a pack of guys and spend three hours finding a paint ball store in New Jersey, and I'm not even going paint balling. I just got back at nine. Myback is killing me. I am so bitter. I would rather have been doing work or blogging. And now I'm bitter that I wasted the day and didn't have fun. And I'm bitter that Jin keeps trying to convince me that there is hope. The Greeks said know thy place, and my place is at the bottom of a well with absolutely no light in sight. Like the song says if it wasn't for bad luck, you know, I wouldn't have no luck at all.

And now I'm even more pissed because I practically announce on the blog what a certain party could do to make me not pissed ie shout out or im or frickin' call and does he take the hint? No. Nope. Not at all. Now jesus, what the hell am I supposed to do, call him up and tell him to call me? That or the more likely answer is he is going to hide behind fear. He's afraid of my rage and let me tell you HE SHOULD BE. Trust me, there are still some tricks I could unleash upon him if I really wanted to hurt him. Of course hurting him isn't actually the goal. On the other hand, if I'm not going to get any kind of effort from him whatsoever, what the hell is the point of holding back?

To prove I'm a better person? Please, I think I proved exactly what kind of moral degenerate I really am a long time ago.

But a word of warning gentle reader, the longer you make me wait to find out exactly what is wrong or make contrition, the angrier I get. And trust me, my rage doesn't burn out like a candle, my wrath is closer to a forest fire. I can burn for years. ( Just ask Eric or my friend treehugger whom I haven't spoken to in two years.)

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